Crossroads

Hi blog friends. I don't know if any of you are the same age as me but I am 18 years old and am at the point in my life where I am trying to figure out my next step and it is TERRIFYING! I have had a few positive things happen and am looking at applying for something big but trying to figure out what is right for me is hard.

Weather or not you are going the college route, there are a lot of choices to come up at this time. Am I ready to move out? How am I going to make money? Should I move out of state? Should I be going to college? Can I afford college? Can I survive in an expensive city? Just know that you are not alone in this. Me and many others just like me are going through the same thing. I think there are a few questions you should ask yourself before considering any big changes.

1. Is this something I really want? This is the most important. Before you uproute the life you have had for you entire life, make sure you really want it. Ask yourself if the desire to do this is coming from you or an outside source. Only do it if it is what you want.

2. What big changes would this entail? Will you have to move for this? Do you need to have reliable transportation? An apartment? All of these are things you need to figure out before you make your choice.

3. Can I handle these changes? You need to ask yourself if you are ready for all of the changes that come with it. If you don't feel that you can handle cooking and cleaning and doing your own laundry, maybe you aren't ready for something this big.

4. Can you financially support this? If you do not have a job lined up, you probably want to look into that. Even if it is a job that you are looking to uproute your life for, will the job support a life in the place you are living? Do you need to pick up extra work? This is incredibly important. Wanting to do it and feeling you are ready are important, but if you can not financially support it, it doesn't matter.

5. Ask yourself again, are you ready for this? If you are anything like me this is the first huge life choice you have had to make and it will be scary. Make sure you are ready for it. There is no shame in admitting that you aren't ready and waiting a year. In that time you can save up and live at home, assuming that is an option, and give yourself a year to warm up to the idea.

I hope this was helpful to some of you. If you are going through something like this feel free to contact me and we can figure it out together, hehehe. Also, if you have any tips, please leave them in the comments, I know I could use them and I am sure others could too.

Nashville Trip 2014

As many of you already know, this month I went to Nashville for a week. I have wanted to go there since I was 6 years old and to finally get the opportunity to visit a place with such a strong emphasis on music was amazing.

On the first day we drove from Florida to Roswell, Georgia, a town about an hour north of Atlanta. My dad dropped me off at the amazing mall that was right near our hotel and I spent a few hours shopping. I had an amazing time and got lots of fun clothes that will be in a video coming out soon! Then we went out to dinner and went back to the hotel early to get some rest before heading out early the next morning.

Friday morning we left bright and early to head out on the 4 hour journey from Roswell to Nashville. After my dad navigated the rush hour traffic through the Atlanta area, I took over the driving. I drove to Chattanooga and the roads were absolutely beautiful. There were huge mountains covered in snow and frozen waterfalls that looked like crystals. As we got close to Nashville we drove past a town called Franklin, TN. One thing that you may or may not know is that is where my favorite band, Paramore, is from. I took about 100 pictures of the signs and was so excited. The next big excitement came as we drove to our hotel. We were staying about a mile from the Grand Ole Opry. As a singer, the Opry is an iconic and very important place to me. Being able to see it and really feel that we were in Nashville was a very surreal moment for me.

After relaxing in the room for a while we headed down to Broadway. In case you aren't familiar, Broadway is the strip of downtown Nashville where all of the music is. We knew a lot of the places by name but being able to go into them was amazing. We were complete tourists and didn't know where to park so we ended up paying $10 for 1 hour so we didn't have long. There was this band that I really enjoyed in Legend's Corner. We spent an hour popping in and out of places and getting a good taste for what was in store for the rest of the week.

Now, I am one of those singers that has certain superstitions. Every time I have traveled for an audition I have had Cracker Barrel for dinner the night before so, on Friday night, my dad and I had dinner there. We stopped at the mall quickly on our way back to the hotel so I could get a pair of leggings and then went back to the room. I tried to get to sleep early but it was to no avail. I had to be up at 7 to get ready for my audition for the Voice.

The next morning I ate a quick breakfast at the hotel and then started to get ready. The outfit I had planned on wear was not the outfit I ended up wearing and after changing like three times I felt ready to go. I am going to do a whole separate post on the audition process because it would make this way too long.

After my audition I was meeting up with my best friend that moved to TN a few years ago. We went to a very cool music store called Grimeys and then ate at this amazing place called the Pharmacy, it is not a drug store. After this me and Amanda went to the mall for about 45 minutes before it closed and then went back to our hotels. Then my dad bought me chocolate because I was sad.

Sunday I slept in and then dad and I went to Cracker Barrel for breakfast (it was walking distance from the hotel). After a quick breakfast we headed down to Broadway. We found good parking this time and had 7 hours on out meter. We went into a bunch of shops first because it was 10:45 am on a Sunday. After a few hours we went into one of the biggest places on Broadway called The Stage. I was still a little sad from my audition but I was enjoying the day. Long story short, the band playing asked me to come up and sing and I ended up singing Walking After Midnight in a place in Nashville!! It was amazing.

After hitting a few more places we headed to the mall to return some clothes I had bought the day before and to have some dinner. After that we met up with Amanda again for about an hour before she had to head back home.

Monday the weather was awful. It was about 35 degrees and raining nonstop. This didn't stop us! We went back down to Broadway where we shopped and I ended up singing onstage with another band at a different place! It was very cool. I also got to go into the Hard Rock and see Hayley Williams microphone from the crushcrushcrush music video. After many hours of braving the weather we headed to get some dinner. Since the time I was about 4 years old I have loved the Olive Garden. When my nana was sick and my mom was having to fly up to New Jersey a lot, my dad would bring me there when she left and it would be our special night out. We found an Olive Garden near where we were staying and went and had an amazing dinner.

Tuesday we were planning on heading back downtown but the weather was just awful. I did a little research and found this very cool restaurant called Monells. It was in this old mansion and had the best fried chicken I have ever tasted. Everything is served family style and you can have as much as you want. It is a good thing that we don't have a place like that near where I live because I would be there all the time.

I hadn't slept much the night before and the weather was still too bad to go out so we went back to the hotel and I took a nap. We were supposed to leave at about 8am Wednesday to drive home but when I woke up at 5pm my dad told me that there was another winter storm headed into Nashville and that if we didn't head out soon, the roads would be awful. Considering we couldn't go out and do anything because of the weather there was nothing to lose so we packed up the car and headed home. 13 hours later, about the time we were supposed to be leaving, we got back home.

It was an amazing trip and I look forward to going back to Nashville with both of my parents some time soon!

PS I have a post filled with pictures of the trip coming up in the next few days.

Free stuff?!? Sign me up!

Hi blog friends! How are you? Sorry if the formatting on this post is a little off, my computer is transfering 125 gigs of photos and video to an external hard drive so I can't use it and I have been relegated to posting from my phone. 

Today I got my Ulta catalog in the mail, for any non-US people it is one of the big beauty stores here. I shop there for pretty much all of the makeup I buy. I haven't bought much since I stopped working before my surgery in October. However, before I went to Nashville I had to restock on some essentials that I had run out of. Between that and a few purchases here and there over the last month I spent enough to qualify for a reward! I thought I would post a few options and get some feedback from you guys as to which I should get! Without further ado, here are some of the options. 

The first option is NYX Butter Lip Balm in Parfait. I was able to find a blog post reviewing it so I have good pictures! 

Next is this Essence Eye pencil in this lovely purple shade that I forgot the name of. 

Finally one of the two of these Revlon nail polishes. 

Let me know which one you like more. And you never know, the one that gets picked might end up in a give away that may be happening soon. Just possibly. 

Have a great day!

Top 5 Favorite Lipsticks

I was never one to wear any lip color until recently. I would wear minimal lip gloss if anything at all. In the last year or so I have entered the beautiful and colorful world that is lip stick! I love wearing them and love the color it can bring to my face in less than a second. I have tried so many shades to try to find the perfect ones for me. I have lots of ones that I love but I have some current faves. Also, forgive the fact that I look insane in these pics, it has been a long day.

1. Rimmel London Kate Moss in shade 14

2. NYX Lipstick in Narcissus

3. Ulta Lipstick in shade 204

4. Ulta Matte Lipstick in 252

5. Elf Matte Lip Color in Rich Red

What is your favorite lipstick? I am always looking for new ones to try so please let me know!

Five High-End Wishlist Products

I have been sitting in the library since 9:45 this morning doing work and school work and now it is time for a break. I spent the last ten minutes sitting awkwardly watching youtube videos on my phone and trying really hard not to laugh. I am also sitting right next to Sephora and using every ounce of strength I have as not to go in and buy things. This got me thinking about five things I wish I could buy if money wasn't an issue.

One thing that I want to try desperately is the Benefit Stay Flawless 15 Hour Primer. I have looked at this every time I am in Sephora or Ulta. I have seen lots of great reviews and have yet to find a primer that I love.

I have also yet to find a foundation that I love. I pretty much only use BB creams because I have tried a lot of foundations but none that work for me. To be fair, I haven't tried any high end foundations so I have low standards to compare it to. The one I want to try is the Tarte Amazonian Clay 12-Hour Full Coverage Foundation.

The next one isn't a crazy expensive one, but it is something that I have wanted to try out for a long time. It is the Korres Lip Butter. I remember hearing one of my favorite beauty YouTubers talk about it years ago and being sad when I found out it was $12 because that was a small fortune to 13 year old me. Now, I think this is going to be my next beauty purchase.

I have only recently gotten into bronzers. Yes, I live in Florida. No, that does not stop me from looking like Casper the ghost. From my years of obsessing over makeup I know that in the minds of many, there is nothing better than the Nars Laguna Bronzer.

Anyone that knows me will know how in love I am with my Urban Decay Naked 2 Palette. I have had it for a year and I use it almost everyday that I wear eye makeup. When I heard about the Naked 3 I figured I would have no interest. I blame my recent obsession on all of you in the blogisphere. People have been reviewing and raving about the Naked 3 and I feel like now at some point I have to get it. It will probably be a while because it is $52. Yes, I realize for as many shadows as you get, it is a good deal, however, that is still $52 I have to find somewhere.

What high end products have you been wanting? I am always looking for new ones to crave. Also, have you tried any of these? Are they worth the price and hype? Let me know.

Hope you are having an amazing day and not working too hard. See you tomorrow!

Blogger Confusion

Hello lovely blog friends. I hope you had a fantastic Valentines Day, mine was spent rehearsing for a very exciting choir show on Saturday. Tangent aside, I actually did have something to talk about today. I have been suffering from a case of what I like to call "Blogger Confusion." I have so many things going on in my life and so many things that I want to write about that I don't know what to write about! I have tried to make a schedule and that just hasn't worked for me so I am throwing that away. I am going to write about what I am feeling or loving at the moment and I think that will make it a lot easier for me.

I am going to plan out my posts in advance to make my life easier. I am currently in school full time, working as a personal assistant, tutoring, making my YouTube videos and I am following an eating plan to help my health conditions that requires me cooking three meals a day! Yes, things are very busy right now.

The exciting thing is how much fun stuff I having coming up in the next few months. Lots of fun concerts and trips as well as my favorite thing of the year, Playlist Live!

Things in my life have been pretty crazy between schedule and health but I love blogging and I want to make sure it isn't something that slips through the cracks during the craziness that is my life right now.

I also am really looking to start talking to other bloggers and dare I say start forming friendships.

If you have anything or any product that you want me to write about make sure to email or tweet me or comment on this post because I am looking for ideas!

Have a wonderful day and I will see you tomorrow!

Dealing with Sadness and Depression

So this is going to be crazy, but I'm changing the order this week mainly because I am writing on my phone right now and the Monday post I want to do requires pictures from my laptop. Call me lazy but it is 3 am and I am cozy in bed and don't feel like going to my desk, oops?

So that being said here we are with a health related post. This is actually going to be a mental health related post. I wanted to take a second to talk about depression. I have suffered with depression on and off for many years. It isn't something I readily talk about but I thought that just going into it a little bit might be able to help someone going through something similar. 

I have been really good for a long time so i feel like it makes it harder when you feel down. I don't know if it is normal, but it is normal for me. For me, when something bad happens I start feeling what I felt when I was deep in depression. Now, I have gotten good at ignoring that feeling 99.6% of the time but there are some times that it just worms it's way in. This happened to me recently when I got turned down from the Voice for the second time. 

What I wanted to talk about is what you can do for yourself and what you can do if a loved one is going through it. 

For me there are a few sure fire things that help me.  I know that there are a lot of people that say that lying in bed and letting depression consume you is awful and while I agree, I think that sometimes giving yourself a day or two to just let yourself decompress can be incredibly helpful. If you see someone depressed in bed, give them a day or two. I have had my parents force me out of bed and though I eappreciate the though so much, it isn't always the best at the time. Another thing that works to combat it quickly is to put on your favorite happy music and dance. It changes your mood almost instantly and ya makes you feel better. Motion creates emotion. One thing that can help is eating your favorite food. Now, I don't mean emotionally overeating. I mean do something like take yourself to your favorite lunch or make your favorite dinner. It is something that releases endorphins in your brain and improves your mood. Probably my favorite thing to do is watch YouTube videos. When I am down I like to look for new people I haven't watched before or find videos from my favorites that I haven't seen before. 

What do you do to deal with sadness? Please let me know because I am always looking for new things to add to my list and yes, it is a real list so that I always have something good to do when I am sad. Sorry for the heavyness of this post I just thought that it was something I was going through and that it could potentially help other people. 

Wanting to Run Away || Thoughts #1

I was sitting here in my bedroom with a million things racing through my head and I thought maybe I would start a new thing where I kind of just talk about what I am feeling and we see how that goes so here it is.

As you probably know, I went to Nashville to audition for the Voice. This was the second time I had auditioned and I was feeling really good about it. Well.....they turned me down. Again. I was pretty crushed. I know in my head that they are casting a TV show and that the reason that I was turned down isn't because I am not talented. But none the less, it is still very discouraging and kind of crushing for the time being.

I came home yesterday distraught over my future. I don't have a next step where as most people my age do, and my last step was a "failure." I found myself thinking that I wanted to run away, move out, something. I didn't know why but I felt like running. It felt like the walls were closing in around me and I didn't know how to deal with it.

After a night of panic and research I decided to continue my schooling. I am taking 5 or six new classes online that I am starting on Monday and then come September, I am starting college near where I live. Because of my health problems, I can't go off to college in the fall like most people my age.

I am much more focused on my career than most people that are 18 because I have been working towards it for about 10 years. I consider myself lucky that I know what I want to do and that it is something that I am good at, but that doesn't make it any easier when you get turned down, even though rejection is such a big part of the business.

I decided that I am going to throw myself into YouTube and blogging for a while. Since I have the privilege of being a partner I figure that I should work on that as hard as I can. I am doing more than music now, branching out into beauty and fashion videos as well as vlogging. My goal is to put out a video every other day and a blog post every day. That doesn't mean that I always will be able to do that, but I am going to try my hardest. Considering I am taking a full course load and working, I think that it going to be a lot, but I do my best with a full schedule.

Sorry for the rambling but I had a lot on my mind today and felt like sharing it. Have you ever felt like this? If so how did you combat it? I could use any tips you have.

Hope you are feeling good today, thanks for reading!

Representing All the Women, Salute!

It's Music Monday!! Now, for a warning, this week is going to be music heavy because of my trip. Today, though, we are starting with an album review. As many of you know I am a huge Little Mix fan and opened for them this summer. Today they released their second album, Salute. I have already listened to whole CD and it is out of this world. It is an amazing mix of pop and urban that you can't help but dance to. There are also some beautiful, emotional ballads that will make you feel every word that they are singing with them. My favorite songs are Little Me, especially the unplugged version, and Boy.

Make sure you buy it, listen to it, and then let me know what your favorites are! I would love to talk to some people about it. What new music have you been listening to recently? I am always looking for new music both for reviews and myself. Hope your week is going as amazing as mine is. I will see you tomorrow with an update on my trip!