I am a firm believer that you have to let pieces of yourself go to make room for new ones. Sometimes pieces are yanked from you. It can be from anything like losing the ability to play an instrument in a car accident to losing a family member. All of these things shape you into the person that you are supposed to be. We, as humans, are never finished. We are a constantly evolving mashup of every event and influence in our lives.
So yes, I lost a piece of myself, but I also found a new one. I lost my job, I ended up writing a book that is going to really help people. I grew apart from friends, I found other that understand and support my passions. I stopped playing guitar, I found my love for production. I lost a family member, I grew closer with others.
Those things don't make the bad things go away, but they make them easier to accept. Behind every seemingly horrific event is the strength that is going to pick you up and pull you through. The last few months have been hard. The next few months will be better.
I spent some time this week turning the fact that I haven't felt well enough to get out of bed into a positive. I watched marathons of interviews of the people that inspire me. I spent sleepless nights finding new undiscovered artists that reignited a love for music that had dulled. I am reinspired in a way that I previously could have only dreamed of.
Obstacles are always going to be here. Bad times will always find away to break apart my happy reality. But I will know that as broken as I feel and as many pieces as my heart is in, that it will be put back together with a force that is to be reckoned with and the person that I will be on the other side will be a strong person with a new outlook on everything in my life.
Inspiration is like a flame. It is going to flicker. There will be things that come along that make it so big that it becomes scary. It may even go out. The thing to remember is that there are lighters everywhere. Your lighter could be someone you love. It could be a piece of art that speaks to you.
Things don't last forever, good or bad. I am not the same person that I was a year ago and that is okay. I won't be the same person I am now in a year and that is okay. If I ever look back on a year and think "wow, I am exactly the same as I was then," that is when I will start to worry.
I am sorry if this makes no sense to some people, I have just had a lot of thoughts in my head for a while and it boiled over tonight. I was inspired to write again.
